Im sure most of you are familiar with the friendship song – the one you sang in girl scouts when you were little – make new friends, but keep the old, one is silver and the other’s gold. A circle goes round, it has no end, thats how long I want to be your friend.
I doubt any adult will tell you differently – making friends as an adult is hard. like H A R D hard. Add being in a different, new country & a lack of hobbies – making friends as an adult might as well be impossible.
For some reason its not socially acceptable to go up to someone in the grocery store and say “You like that cheese? me too! Lets go for drinks on Friday”. Wouldn’t that be awesome? A friendship formed on the mutual basis of loving cheese? Sign me up! But in all seriousness – I’ve tried to make small talk in all the normal places – book stores, pharmacy, check out lines at the grocery store, with the table next to be at Starbucks and even at the bar when ordering drinks. Almost every time I get weird looks (brits do not like small talk!) So whats a girl to do?
Unfortunately after 2 years here I can count my local friends on 1 hand. It used to be two, but thats a long story I don’t want to get into.
What makes making friends even harder is a lack of “fun money” as Steve and I call it. Between saving for the wedding, saving for travel plans and the gym membership (hello wedding diet that isn’t working) I find myself with not much extra cash to spend on nights out or trying new hobbies.
I tried meetup.com – it was going really well, met some fab people, but every events was a £20 spend minimum, between food and a few drinks. Thats got pricy quick and I didn’t really find anyone I connected with beyond meeting up as part of the group.
I’ve tried coworkers, but my old office was small (9 employees) and the fact that 6 of them hated Americans and made that a known fact didnt lead to friendships. My current office is bigger and much more friendly – so Im working on building a friendships there. Not as easy as I’d like. Ive also signed up to take a photoshop class at the local technical college – so hopefully Ill meet some fellow photography nerds there and build some bonds.